A Journey Back to Health: Part 5 - Moving Forward, Preserving Health

Intentionality. It's going to require intentionality.

Growing up, eating my grandpa's super foods, I hardly ever got sick, I had hair so thick that I could barely tame it, and I had so much energy that it seemed endless. He gave me a gift... good health through eating densely nutritious food. He was so intentional about how he kept his garden and fed his children. I reaped the benefits of his intentionality. But I am learning that he left us a legacy of knowledge so that we can also be intentional in caring for our health.

I know how it feels to have thriving health and I know how it feels to lose that health. I refuse to let my health slip through my fingers, voluntarily. But I have had to make some intentional changes in my life. Here are some of the changes that I made that have preserved my health...

1) I wear gloves when cleaning. I don't let chemicals absorb into my skin, even when using disinfectant wipes, and especially Sani-Cloths for my work. I always wear gloves.

2) I visit Dr. Kelley about once every 1-2 years for a physical. She oversees my health and advises the exact supplements I need to keep my health strong. 

3) A routine cleanse. Ivermectim with Mebendazole is a prescription option but please beware it does not kill Tapeworm.
Wormwood with Black Walnut is a natural supplement option but be sure that the quality is proven and effective. Please do your own in-depth research before starting a cleanse. As the parasites and worms die off, they release toxins which can make you temporarily sick. These products are not safe while pregnant or nursing.

4) I take supplements that are sourced from food. My favorite vitamin is Rainbow Light. They have options for men, women and children. I also take Shakeology. I love Shakeology because it is packed with the probiotics, prebiotics, digestive enzymes and fibers that our digestive systems need on a daily basis. It is also packed with many other super foods. 

5) I try to limit stress as much as possible. This is harder said than done in our society today. There is so much pressure to get involved with as much as possible and keep our schedules packed. I intentionally try to build margin into our daily and weekly schedules. We also changed our careers to reduce stress. 

6) Focus on postpartum recovery. No matter how intentional we are in retaining our health, a pregnancy is going to set you back. That is why I hope to write more posts about postpartum recovery. 

7) Physical Therapy. After pregnancy it is good to have a physical therapist give you an exam. They can determine exactly where you need help and tailor a treatment plan that fits you. It is very important to be overseen by a professional because if we do not heal correctly or if we push ourselves too hard then we can get injured. I have tried to do it on my own in the past and was never able to successfully close my abdominal separation. But with the help of a professional... I have achieved great success! Check with your insurance to see how many sessions of PT they cover. For me, it took 10 sessions to achieve closure and abdominal healing. But even if you can only afford a few sessions, they can help give you the foundations you need to move forward in the right direction. 

8) We have a family plan to visit a local chiropractor 2 times per month for preventative maintenance. Some chiropractors offer family plans and will negotiate a price if you have lots of children. 

Other foods I eat to heal my digestive system...

Kombucha has billions of living probiotics that support gut health, immunity, and digestion. Anything that is fermented is good for gut health as it increases microbial diversity and balances microbiome.

(Synergy is my favorite brand.
Lemon Berry is my favorite flavor.)

Sauerkraut - we try to incorporate sauerkraut into our weekly meal menu. We tell the kids that we are having a "German Food Night" and they get excited! We like to eat it with kielbasa and bread with honey on it. It helps it settle in the stomach. 

Bone Broth has a high concentration of collagen and amino acids. It has many benefits but for digestion it reduces gut inflammation and strengthens the digestive lining. I switched to bone broth when making stews and soups. The kids didn't even notice the difference. Or you could mix 1/2 bone broth with 1/2 of your regular broths.

(I have been using this one from Walmart)

As a good father, my grandpa wanted his children and grandchildren to be healthy. In the same way, God, our Father in heaven, also wants his children to be healthy. God deeply cares about your health.

That is why I am sharing my story with you. I want you to thrive in life. I want you to have the strength to follow the Lord and live an adventurous life, accomplishing the desires the Lord has set on your heart.

Dear Lord,
I pray for the person reading my blog. I know that you are a good Father and you deeply care about their health. I pray that you would guide them towards better health. Please lead them to the right doctors, the right supplements and the right foods that will help their health thrive. Bring healing, wholeness and strength to their bodies.
In Jesus precious name I pray. Amen

A Journey Back to Health: Part 4 - How did I get here?

I am not an expert but I do read their books and online articles. I am not a doctor but I do like to pick the brains of my doctors with questions so that I can gain better understanding. I can't say for sure what the main reason was for why my health depleted but I do have some very strong guesses. But first, let's back up a little bit...

When I was very young my grandpa kept a garden, apple trees, plum trees and many blueberry bushes on his property. He also had his own chicken coup. There was a horse farm next door and he would get their old manure and use it in his garden. He would make his own compost pile with the scraps from the table and egg shells. He would also get oak leaves and make his own mulch. He would water his garden with water from his pond that was full of bass fish. 

I believe that the manure, homemade compost, oak leaf mulch, and possibly the pond water enriched the soil causing the garden to thrive! His garden was amazing, full of big, beautiful vegetables! His blueberry bushes were bursting with berries to the point that we could not pick them all. We needed to have "Blueberry Picking Parties" and by the end we hoped that we could make a dent in the picking. 

(Grandpa made his chicken coup out of scrap pieces of wood.)

Grandma and my mom took the food and made hearty, nutritious meals. The food we ate tasted so good and I ate it all up! I was a big eater! 

(Me on my grandpa's property, eating plums. I was always eating!)

I really attribute my good health, when I was growing up, to my grandpa's garden. The nutrition that was in his fruits, vegetables, and eggs made my health thrive! But when grandpa died when I was 18 years old, I moved out of state for internships/school and the property was eventually sold. From then on, I ate grocery store fruits and vegetables. I really think that is when I started to lose a lot of nutritional intake. I just don't think that our food holds the same nutritional value that it once did. 

Thank you grandpa for all those years of feeding us 
nutritionally dense food!

But what made everything spiral downward? I have some thoughts and theories...

1) When I was in middle school and high school I started cleaning houses for family friends and church members for money. I loved to clean and had a lot of energy to burn so that is what I mainly did for work throughout the years. Some days, I would work 10 hours and it was no big deal. Looking back, that was hours upon hours of my hands working with chemicals without wearing gloves. I felt like gloves slowed me down. I could clean better and more detailed without gloves. But those chemicals were soaking into my skin and into my body. I wonder if constant exposure over many years triggered the onset of PCOS.

2) PCOS is a hormonal imbalance that can cause significant digestive issues. When a woman goes through any hormonal change, it can cause digestion to slow. 

3) During my trips to Africa we were always aware of parasites. We would get tested every once in a while. I would always leave Africa with anti-parasite medication in-hand and would take the medicine on my way back home. But was that enough? Did something slip through? What about worms? Africa aside, America has parasites and worms also. Could I have picked something up while living in the dorms at school?

4) I was taking cheap vitamins and supplements. As much as I love holistic health and wellness, I really do think that there are many vitamins and supplements out there that are fake. At best, many of the vitamins and supplements are just not absorbing into our bodies as much as we think they are. Regulation by the FDA for vitamins and supplements is very lacks. The FDA does not test the vitamins and supplements for effectiveness and the manufacturer is responsible for labeling. Therefore, I don't automatically trust the vitamin and supplement industry.

5) Stress. I allowed myself to take on too much stress and obligation in my life as a mom with young kids. The stress took a toll on my health and created a viscous cycle. Stress increases cortisol levels in the body which significantly affects digestion.

6) Pregnancy. During pregnancy, the woman's intestines are scrunched up around her uterus as her baby grows and eventually takes up the majority of the space. The stomach is also pushed upward. It is amazing that the digestive system can even function while being under so much pressure. But, the body is amazing!

7) After pregnancy the organs go back into their places but this time the abdominal muscles are weakened and are not able to hold the organs in place as well. According to Google, "The transverse abdominis (TrA) is the deepest, horizontal-fiber abdominal muscle acting as a natural, protective "corset" or girdle that stabilizes the spine, supports the back, and compresses the abdominal organs. It is vital for core strength, reducing back pain, and supporting posture."

Also, about 60% of women have Diastasis Recti which is the separating of the abdominal (6 pack) muscle after pregnancy. Without strengthening her muscles, and closing both the width and the depth, she is at risk for hernias. Here is an article from the Cleveland Clinic about Diastasis Recti if you would like to learn more information. And Yes! Men can also have Diastasis Recti!

The separation in my abdominal muscles was getting worse with each pregnancy, both the width and the depth.

And of course, having and nursing my babies took a lot of nutrition from my body

Have you ever taken a vitamin or supplement and didn't feel like it made much of a difference? Have you ever traveled overseas? Have you ever done a cleanse? Have you ever had multiple pregnancies and felt your strength deplete?

I had a wise, elderly woman once tell me, "Half the battle is finding out the problem. After that, we can move forward in the right direction." This has been true for me in this situation. As I look back at my story of depleting health, I can now see all the problems that occurred and contributed. 

Now what am I going to do about it? How can I keep my health on track moving forward?

My Journey Back to Health: Part 3 - The Foundation of Health

As time went by, I found myself on a continual cycle. I would get to a certain level of health, I would have another baby, and then I would have to start all over trying to regain my health.

A few years, a few more doctors, a nutritionist, and a few more babies later and I finally feel like I am in a place of strong health. To sum it all up... I discovered that the digestive system is the foundation for good health and my digestive system was a mess! Let me explain...

We cannot be healthy without having a healthy digestive system. It is the system that converts our food to energy, absorbing nutrition into our bodies, and delivering it to every other organ system. There is even research connecting digestive health to mental health. 

So in my journey, I had found yet another doctor of chiropractic who also practiced holistic medicine and she was able to solve the majority of my health problems. I went to see Dr. Kelly at Emley Family Chiropractic. She found a plethora of other issues including PCOS (hormonal imbalance), adrenal glad depletion, and digestive problems. 

My digestive problems that were found throughout the years:
    1) I had a misaligned disc in my lower back that she put back into place

    2) I had an unbalanced gut microbiome 
    3) I had a weak intestinal valve
    4) I had a blockage
    5) I did not have enough digestive enzymes
    6) I possibly did not have enough stomach acid to digest my food

She gave me the exact supplements that my body needed to heal, and I started feeling results fast! Within weeks my health was taking a complete U-turn. I continued to research, read books and find my own products because I knew that once Dr. Kelly was able to get me to a place of good health then I was going to have to maintain my health daily through the busyness of life.

Digestive health is complex. We need a variety of nutrients to keep our digestive system healthy and fully functioning. I call it, "Feeding the Digestive System". When we take care of our digestive system then our digestive system will turn around and take care of us. 

In the process of healing my digestive system, I also found healing for my PCOS and adrenal glands.

But how did I get to this place of poor health in the first place?

A Journey Back to Health - Part 2: A Glimmer of Hope

My blood work came back normal and my MD told me there was nothing he could do to help me. 

But I wasn't giving up! After hours of research, reading books, googling, trying different products, and trying different types of doctors....I still came to dead ends and nothing was really helping.

My mom mentioned my health issues to one of her electrolysis clients (who was a chiropractor and also practiced holistic medicine) and the woman gave my mom her business card.

What did I have to lose? I had to try and see.

I brought my blood test results (from my Family Doctor) to her for our first appointment. She took a quick glance and said "Your iron is way too low!". But my MD doctor said it was within normal range and I was taking an iron supplement. How could that be? She said that the medical doctors have a much wider spectrum of "Normal" for blood test results. She gave me a natural iron supplement that is much easier to digest and it helped! It was called, "Ferrofood" from Standard Process!

But soon symptoms returned. I felt like I just couldn't get enough iron in my body to feel well. I went back to another doctor who had the same kind of practice and he discovered that my body was still not absorbing the iron well. So he focused on my digestive health. He got me to a certain point of healthy functioning but I never really got the full answers that I needed.

We were on the right track but the answers were not fully revealed yet.

Do you ever feel like the medical doctors are in the business of keeping us alive but not necessarily in the business of making us thrive?

Have you ever gone to multiple doctors and each of them gave you just a piece of the puzzle?

That has been my journey! Researching, discovering and trying what works for me.

I feel led to share some of those things that helped me gain back my health because maybe it will help someone else.

A Journey Back to Health - Part 1: My health depleting

I wrote this back in 2017 but never posted it. It just didn't feel like the right timing and the doctor I went to never did end up helping me. This is just a reminder of how long this journey has been and where it all started...

"If you have known me for any length of time then you would also know me as a very active, energetic and physically strong person. I enjoy eating healthy but I also like my sweets too.

As a child, I would run circles around other kids because of all the energy I had. You would find me spending most of my days swimming in a lake, wake boarding, riding bikes and keeping up with the boys in all their outdoor adventures.

As a young adult, most of my energy was geared towards doing mission work, travelling back and forth to Africa, and living overseas.

Once married, most of my energy was geared towards working hard and renovating our home.

Once I became a mom, I started to slow down. Not because I wanted to but because I had to. 

It didn't really hit me hard until after my second child was born and I found myself so exhausted at the end of the day that I literally felt like I could pass out on the couch. I started to feel weak, not just because I worked hard that day, but because I honestly just didn't have the physical strength to go throughout my day. I had trouble with by blood pressure during my pregnancy with Micah - an issue I have never dealt with before. After he was born I struggled with constipation, weakness, and feeling light-headed frequently.  

With almost a year after Micah's birth, I felt like my body never really recovered. 

Maybe it was because I had Jael to take of as well?

Maybe it is because I am almost 30 years old? 

Maybe it is because child bearing really is that hard on your body?

Or Maybe something deeper was going on?

Not only was I dealing with exhaustion but I also had many areas of stress in my life: relationships, being a new mom of 2 young kids, work, and all the stresses that just naturally come in life. There were times that I had to call Curtis home from work because I didn't think I could physically take care of the kids. Or I skipped church because I lacked the strength to pack up the kids in the car and drive 15 minutes down the road (Curtis is a pastor so I he has to be there early)

My health got so bad that there were a few nights Curtis literally had to help me get to bed. As I closed my eyes to sleep I literally had the thought... "I hope I wake up in the morning"

And then one day it dawned on me... In the past 2.5 years I have had 2 early miscarriages, birthed 2 babies and nursed for a combined total of 2 years. What if my body is just depleted of vital nutrients?

I went to see my Family Doctor for a general physical exam where he found me to be generally healthy and we devised a plan on how to move forward in investigating the root problem.

He ordered some blood tests, told me to exercise daily and eat healthy!"

My Little Garden

My home is my garden!

It is the garden I tend to on a daily basis. It is the place where I cultivate the ground, plant seeds, water the soil, pluck weeds and bear fruit. It is a daily work, hard work. It is constant. All day and even at night. It is moment by moment. It is in the smallest moment where true growth happens.

Growth happens under the right environment. I have to ensure my environment/home, encourages growth!

What do I grow? I grow minds, hearts, little souls.... little children that will grow to be whatever they choose.

24/7 I am a mother. I cultivate 24/7. But on Monday-Friday 7am-5pm I invite other children from within the community into my home to GROW. It is called, "Little Garden Family Day Care". We are family owned and operated.

I have always wanted to be a mother .... but a few years ago I discovered that child care and working with children in general is my passion. So why not turn my passion into a career? About 2-3 years ago I had the idea to start my own in home day care where I can work and be a stay at home mom. And 1 year ago "Little Garden Family Day Care" officially launched!

It was a risk! I had a decent paying nanny job where I could take Jael with me to work. But it wasn't my dream... it paid the bills. At that same time, Curtis got a new job that allowed us the financial wiggle room for me to take the risk.

So I quite my job in the fall, enrolled in some online courses at Penn Foster University, gave myself a $500 start up fund and a goal of 6 months to launch the business. It was hard work and no pay! I had classes to take, books to read, contracts to write, accounts to open, guidelines to draw and an entire business idea to create out of nothing. And of course, a name! I wanted to capture the essence of my business within the name. Nothing seemed to fit. I prayed. I asked God. I threw a lot of names away. They were good but just not right.

Then one Sunday morning while listening to our pastor preach the name just popped into my head... with no explanation why. "Little Garden" because my home is my garden. It was perfect.

Since launching the business in January 2015 there have been ups and downs. Times that I have rejoiced and times that I have cried and considered closing it down and finding a "real job".

But I stuck with it and the results have been exciting. Children are growing. Parents are excited to see the difference in their children as they come to my day care. They are growing socially as we learn to share, be considerate and listen to directions. They are growing in their hearts as we play and laugh together. They are growing in their minds as we have "Learning Time" everyday where we work on colors, numbers, letters and more!

But as I "grow" children... I realize that I am also growing! I am growing in patience, perseverance and creativity. I am also growing in the Lord. Let's face it... there is no way around it... no matter how passionate you are about child care.... IT IS HARD! It is hard work and it is just simply hard all around. Children demand so much time, energy and attention. And in order to endure, I have to rely fully on the Lord for daily, moment by moment strength.

But the harder I work.... the more I realize. I may do everything right to tend my garden. But it is God who does the true growing. He is the one who gives Life! He is the one who makes their hearts beat, their lungs full of air, their minds function, their bodies grow and their hearts to be full. God is the source of all life. He is the source for these children and the source of my "Little Garden Family Day Care".

 "A Surrendered Heart" by Chip Coates

So from the very beginning I had to surrender the business to God. Lord whatever you want to do with this business is up to you. I give it all to you because I know that you are the Supreme Gardener of our hearts and lives.

Let's see what he does with it in year 2!

10 things I have learned since being a mom...

#10  Don't sweat the small stuff! All that really matters at the end of the day is that my baby is healthy and safe in my arms.

#9 No matter how hard the day is ... it is still a blessing! 

#8 I want others to hold my baby! (after washing your hands please :) ). I don't want her to be afraid of people. I don't want her to be so attached to me, her mother, that she doesn't go to other people.

#7 Sometimes all she wants is just someone to hold her... and that's just ok!

#6 No matter how old she gets ... she will ALWAYS be my baby!

#5 Poop! Poop! Poop! Sometimes it is hard to believe how much smelly poop can come out of such a cute girl. But after some time it doesn't even gross me out anymore. :)

#4 When people love and reach out to my baby, it feels like they are loving and reaching out to me. My love for my daughter and my connection to her runs deeper than I ever thought possible. When I look at her it feels like my heart is beating outside of my body.

#3 Being healthy is not just about being skinny. Ok, I confess! There have been seasons in my life that I was more focused on being skinny then I was in just being healthy and strong. But now that I am a mom, I realize more than ever... being healthy is about being STRONG and FIT! I need to be strong so that I can carry my baby in her car seat across parking lots. And I want to be FIT so that I can still run and play with her in the back yard after a full day of work. I want to be healthy so that I can live a full life with my baby!

#2 Never underestimate the power of a small act of kindness even to a complete stranger! I can't tell you how thankful I have become when a stranger opens the door for me when they see me coming with a stroller or when a stranger offers to help me in the public bathroom when I am changing my baby's diaper or when a family member offers to hold her so that I can finish eating my meal. Small acts have huge impact!

#1 The more I lay down my life for my daughter the easier and more joyful being a mom becomes... let me explain! When I try to take care of her while having my own focus and agenda for the day I start to notice that I get frustrated with her a lot easier. I get frustrated because she's crying and not letting me do the dishes when I want to. Or she needs a diaper change AGAIN when I am trying to relax and watch some T.V. When I focus on myself it becomes a burden to take care of her. But when my focus is on HER and HER NEEDS then it becomes a whole lot easier and enjoyable. Instead of getting frustrated at her for interrupting my schedule I will gladly put those unnecessary things aside, those things can wait because my baby needs me. Instead, I find myself approaching her with more compassion and desire to help her in any way that I can. Being a mom is ALL about sacrifice on a daily basis. But that sacrifice does not have to be a burden! It can be a joy if we have the right focus.

Our baby Girl!

Jael Victoria 

What’s in her name? Yes, her first name is very unique but it can be found in Judges 4 in the Bible. Her story is short and somewhat intense in what she did but there is more to this woman than what first meets the eye when reading through her story.

When Curtis and I read through her story we see a woman of bravery and hospitality. She was a woman who guarded her home, who would not let evil dwell within her house. She was a woman of loyalty, loyal to God’s chosen people, Israel. She was a woman of action, who would not sit idly by when faced with injustice and God blessed her for it.

Her name, Jael, means “gazelle/mountain goat”, animals who have hinds feet and are able to climb the highest on mountain tops where others are unable to go because of the difficulty of the terrain. Why is this so important? Because God will establish His Kingdom on top of Mount Zion and He calls us up the mountain to meet with Him there. (Isaiah 2:2-3) We pray our daughter would have a heart of perseverance and strength, having a desire to endure any trial that comes her way in order to truly meet with our Father in Heaven and experience His liberating presence.

Her middle name, Victoria, means “one who is victorious”. We pray that she would be victorious in life, which means to hold to her faith in Jesus, no matter what may come her way. We pray victory over her!

1 John 5:4-5
 “For every child of God defeats this evil world, and we achieve this victory through our faith. And who can win this battle against the world? Only those who believe that Jesus is the Son of God.” 

Our home in progress!

Wow! I can't believe it has been 5 months since my last post! I feel like so much has happened since then but also at the same time I feel like not a lot has happened to update on. To sum it up short... we have been working on renovating our house and we got pregnant! :) Other than that, not much has happened.

This renovation has been intense and has consumed our lives... but we are not really complaining. We are so happy to be working on OUR HOME where we will raise our baby. We are so excited to see the dramatic transformation as we tear down walls and ceilings, totally gut the kitchen and bathroom and make it completely our own from top to bottom. But man is it a lot of work! We are doing all the work ourselves, with the guidance and help of my dad. Without his expertise there is no way we could take on a project this big.

Although it has been an immense blessing to be home owners, we have to admit that there have been times that we have grown so weary and tired, wondering if the house will ever get finished. Just this past week or so Curtis got discouraged and I had to encourage him, but then a couple days later I got discouraged and he had to encourage me. It has been busy, emotional, and exhausting. But just this past weekend God sent reinforcements to encourage our hearts, lend a helping hand and give us a HUGE jump forward in progress.

We had a painting party and a handful of individuals from our church came out to help. We were so encouraged and blessed to have them come but we were even more blessed by how hard they worked on our house. Within one day, they had helped us paint the entire first floor of our house. A project that would have taken us at least a week, they completed in a matter of hours. Our hearts were overwhelmed knowing how much time and work they saved us.

Thank you so much to ALL who helped us!!!

Now we can focus on refinishing the wood floors and working on the kitchen this next week. And then we are on the home stretch. We are so relieved knowing that we see the light at the end of the tunnel. Our house is moving forward and we will soon be in our home!

I also just want to take a moment to honor Curtis. He has been working so incredibly hard for months now and keeps so much joy in his heart. He is empowered knowing that he is building a home for our family and that knowledge gives him strength and motivation for each day. My heart is moved by how hard he works (60-80 hours a week between his full time job and working on the house). Before I got pregnant we would work on the house together all the time but now I slowly have to back away from the hard labor because it is not safe. But Curtis never complains or makes me feel bad. He just tells me to take care of myself and our baby. What an amazing man that I am so thankful for!!!

Making our house a home!

So much has happened these past couple of months! To sum it up ... we moved to Ohio near my home town and bought a fixer-upper, starter home!

But let me start by saying that it was not an easy decision to leave Maryland. In fact, we loved it! (especially for me) I loved being near my sister and forming a strong relationship with my niece and nephew. I loved living in a small town up in the mountains. And I loved my jobs. (yes I had a couple part-time nanny jobs) Maryland was so good to us and we have no regrets about moving there.

We were also doing well financially because we were making sacrifices in how we spent our money. Many of our dates nights consisted of a .99 cent ice cream cone from McDonalds and a walk in the park. If we did go out to eat, it was at the small town restaurant where we could both eat for $15 easy. Curtis and I also went through Financial Peace University and became even more focused on how we spent and saved our money. We were both working as hard as we could, making sacrifices and seeing some major results.

We were also ready to buy a house and quite paying so much in rent per month. We were ready ... to settle down in a place that we could have a starter home and where Curtis could have more opportunity to pursue his passions in ministry and a career. And the best place we could think to do that was Ohio!

Then this summer we went on our mission trip with Visiting Orphans to Uganda/Kenya and God rocked our world! We were blown away by how "at home" we both felt there and how much we loved reaching out to the children there. I specifically felt like my calling and passion in life was confirmed and couldn't wait to get my feet back on African soil. But both Curtis and I knew deep down that it would probably be years until we went back. We know that God has some work for us to do here in America first. But that doesn't mean that we can't begin preparing ourselves now and placing ourselves in a position so that when God says, "Go!" we CAN go!!!

So in order to keep ourselves in that position we decided to buy an affordable, fixer-upper house that we could easily pay off ... and we had to move to Ohio in order to do that.

It took so many months of looking but we finally got our house! We have had the keys for 2 weeks now and tackled the renovation process head on! We are doing most all of the work ourselves with the help of my mom and dad. I thank God for my dad because if it wasn't for his expertise in carpentry/remodeling there is no way we could have taken on a project this big.

 

My mom and I are actually standing where the kitchen once was ... total demo!

We are raising the ceiling. 

Here is the height before and after

It makes it feel so much bigger inside!

 

Now that I have seen...

Now that we have seen and have held these children in our own arms... what will we do now??? We can't turn away and do nothing. But what can we do when we are so far away and so disconnected from the suffering of these children?

This is a question that we have asked ourselves as a couple and maybe you have asked yourself as well. Sometimes it can seem hopeless about whether or not we can really make a difference. Not one individual can change the world on their own... but we can make a world of difference in just one life... and for Curtis and I that is enough.

We have some big plans that we are storing in our hearts for the future and we are beginning to make decisions now that will position and enable us to one day walk forward in those plans. But what can we do right now???

Well, there is more that we can do than what we first think. I've got lots of ideas and here are just a few of them ...

•  We can sponsor a child either through Compassion International, Return Ministries, or another trusted organization

•  We can financially give towards "Feed My Starving Children" - this is an organization we got to know and became involved with while in Minnesota. Give just 22 cents and provide 1 meal for 1 child!

•  We can go on a trip to visit an orphanage overseas or with an organization like "Visiting Orphans"

•  We can adopt internationally or here in the States

•  We can foster a child here in the States

•  We can be advocates and raise awareness for orphans in our churches, at work, or with friends/family

•  We can pray!!!

•  We can read books and study about how to effectively help the poor and abandoned

Thank you for following our story, supporting our dreams and being interested enough to read our blog to learn more about how to reach out to orphans! Let's go make a world of difference in a child's life!

Some of my reflections ...

So it has been a couple of weeks now since we have been back from Africa and we have been able to really process and reflect on our experience there. We went so many places and saw so many children in such great need. How could our hearts not be moved?! And they were! Both Curtis & I long to return to Africa. It was crazy how we both felt more at home there than we do here in the States. God are you calling us long-term to Africa??? Maybe ... but not right now. It's not time for us to go but still we long for Africa and for the children. As we wait for God's timing to move us forward, we are seeking God on how to specifically get involved now. The question is not, will we get involved? ...  but HOW?

Why get involved? Here are some deep heart questions that I have wrestled with and the conclusions I have arrived at. Maybe you have asked yourself some of these same questions...

Sometimes I think to myself ... there are so many orphan ministries out there ... does the world really need another one? Then I remember that there are more than 153 million orphans in the world today (And the number continues to rise). So if there were ONE MILLION solid orphan ministries in the world (reaching 50 orphans each) then they would still only be reaching a portion of the children in need. Of course, the world needs more solid orphan ministries!

* That is not even counting all the children who have one or two parents but live in extreme poverty

But then I think to myself ... But with 153 million orphans ... am I really going to be able to make that much of a difference? But then I remember how precious just one single life is. I know that I value my own life and I am just ONE person... do I matter? YES! Does ONE orphaned child matter? YES! Each child has a name, a story, a future, hopes and dreams, and an impact that they will personally make in this world.

But then I think to myself ... But shouldn't I just focus on my own family and having my own children? ... but then I remember that my children will one day be growing up in the same world as these 153 million orphaned children. They will be walking along side them on the streets, working alongside them and possibly even marry one of them. The future of our world will be in the hands of the children, all of them! Who will we raise them to be? And how will they impact the world around them and the people next to them (one of them possibly being my own biological child)? Will we take care of them now so that when they grow up they will know how to take care of each other?

~ This little girl was still traumatized because she was abandoned by her mother and still remembered. She would not talk or interact with me at all or anyone else. For hours I held her, talked to her, and just lightly rubbed her arm to show her love. After such a long time, she finally opened up to me and began to play in the dirt. She was abandoned but brought into a new family at "Haven of Hope". My heart was broken at the realization of how deeply these children are wounded by their experiences. They are so desperate and hungry for love and attention.

God please lead us on how to get involved and make a difference in these children's lives!!!

More on our trip!

We went so many places and loved so many children but there were some very special people that God specifically placed on our hearts. So I wanted to share a bit more specifically on who truly captured our hearts on this trip.

Right at the beginning of the trip God brought us to an amazing ministry in Uganda. We were welcomed with such love and hospitality both from the ministry leaders and the children. "Return Ministries" seeks to care for the orphaned children in their area by placing them in homes within the community. They have about 150 children under their care that they work tirelessly to understand their background, care for their needs, feed them and teach them. As of right now, they are renting so much space for the their housing and church property. But because of the consistent need to pay rent on a monthly basis so much of the funds has to be used to sustain the ministry rather than giving where it is needed most ... in caring for the children. Their goal is to raise money so that they can purchase land so that they can build a community center. That way, they are no longer burdened by monthly rent and can use donated money for the children's school fees, clothing, medical bills, food and more! If you are interested in learning more about their ministry or donating towards their goal of purchasing land, please visit their website at http://www.returnministriesuganda.org/

Sarah and Samuel

founders of "Return Ministries"

At return ministries there was a specific girl who truly captured my heart. I only spent a few days with her but I did grow to love her deeply. Her name was "Valely"! She immediately ran to me from the moment she saw me and she barely left my side for 2 days. During that time we really took care of each other in little ways! We really grew a special connection and I could easily pick her out of crowd of 300 children. I will miss her dearly and pray that I will see her again one day!

Valely and I

While in Kenya at one of the orphanages there was a little boy who immediately ran and clung to me. His name is Moses! He was so impressed that I was able to speak some Swahili that he immediately ran and told some of his friends. He couldn't believe that a Mzunge (white person) could speak some of their language. He grew so dear to my heart during those days at the orphanage... he became a true friend!

Moses and I

And then there was Pauline at Amazing Grace children's home! Wow! She was so precious! I immediately felt a connection with her and was drawn to her sweet spirit. She was so thankful that we were there to visit them. When we handed her a small coloring book with 4 crayons she was the one who looked at me and asked, 

"Is this for me?!" 

I said, "Yes, just for you". 

She then responded... "Wow, it's BEAUTIFUL!!!"

She taught me something profound in that moment... What may seem insignificant and small to us could mean the world to an orphaned child. It doesn't take much to show them love and value. She taught me to be thankful for everything... no matter how big or small!

Pauline and I

A trip of a life time!

How do words begin to express 2 weeks in Africa, 2 countries, over 500 children, 5 ministries, 22 team members, and 1 million amazing memories?! "Amazing" doesn't even seem to do justice to begin to describe our experience but I will try!

Curtis and I both have had extensive mission experiences in the past. He has gone on more than 11 short term mission trips that brought him to nearly every continent in the world. and I had been to eastern Kenya for a total of about 17 months. But with all my time overseas, I had not spent much time specifically in orphan ministry. So I have to admit that even I doubted at times how effective we could be in such a short time there. But the most amazing aspect of this trip was to see how such simple acts of kindness could so deeply affect an orphaned child. These children are so hungry for love and attention that the simplest touch, hug, kiss or word of encouragement is something that they will remember for the rest of their lives. What seems small and insignificant to us ... means the world to them! Wow! What simple, yet powerful love?!

What I continued to hear over and over again from the local people was such an expression of thanksgiving. They thanked us continually for being willing to leave our comfortable homes in America and travel half way across the world so that we could spend some time with them. They were so blessed by our visit and we were so blessed to know how much it meant to them!

Our team was on a mission not only to love and bless the orphaned children but also to relieve some of the burden for the workers. They work so hard day in and day out to care for the children so we wanted to go and serve them as well. There were times that we told the workers to go take a break while we cared for the children for a while. And twice we were able to shop for, prepare and serve a feast for the workers and children (And in Africa that is no small task!).

We also brought so much needed supplies like clothes, baby formula, wipes, diapers, medicine and more! My mom had brought an entire suite case full of supplies and had been praying about where to distribute the formula she had purchased. She didn't feel like she was supposed to give all the formula to the ministry that specifically requested it and so hung on to it, not knowing there was a need at the next orphanages we were going to. But sure enough, at "Haven of Hope" in Kenya my mom asked the owner whether or not she needed formula and the woman started crying and praising God... She had been praying for a week for formula because they were out. Both my mom and the owner broke down in tears because of God's goodness.

(Owner at Haven of Hope)

We also did a VBS lesson for all the children. We told them that they are beautifully made in God's image and that we are kings and queens in God's royal family when we believe in Jesus! We then had paper crowns for each child that they could personally decorate and keep. One of the girls on our team had brought a polarized camera. So we took a picture of each child with their crown and gave the picture to them to keep so they could always remember the truth they learned that day.

In Kenya especially, the older children like to write letters to you as a sign of friendship... and of course they would like a letter in return. At one of the orphanages we were staying at, the children wrote so many letters to us and they took the stickers and jewels that we gave them to decorate their crowns and used them to decorate our letters. How selfless! These children were taking what they had (what we had just given to them) and giving it to us!

These are just a few ways that we were used in Uganda and Kenya to serve the people there! Later I will post about individuals that we met and how they stole our hearts!

Please pray with us!

We are so excited about our trip in just a few days. It always amazes me on how fast time goes by when looking back. We have been waiting for this trip for about a year now, either in our hearts and/or actually planning and fundraising. We have been overwhelmed with the amount of support, love and prayers we have received fromm those whom we know. And we have been so thankful!!!

This time we are asking for your prayers while we are actually on the field. We will spend one week in Uganda and one week in Kenya. We will be taking 8 flights, stay in a rural village for a few days, come in contact with more than 500 orphans and visit up to 5 orphanages.

Would you please pray for us, with us and for those we will be coming in contact with?

Please pray for:

Safety for us, my mom and the team
That we will have increased energy and strength
That this will be a positive experience for my mom (this is her first mission trip)
That the children will know the love of Christ through us and be transformed!

Life with a few adventures!

Life is good and God has truly been so good to us during this season of life. Curtis and I are working hard in our jobs but also taking the opportunities at hand to embrace this season with joy. One day we went to visit DC to see the Cherry blossom trees in bloom and I told Curtis in the car on our way home, "We sure do like to work hard and play hard!" ... He responded with a laugh ... "Yah, and then we go home and sleep hard!" :) So yes, we are working hard, embracing some adventures and sleeping in when we can, since many times we don't go into work until later in the day.

So some quick updates:

- We are almost funded for our mission trip! We are only awaiting the finalization for our airline tickets and then we will know exactly where we stand financially! Any overage in finances that we raise will be used on the field during our trip to bless the children. Thank you so much to everyone who has given to us so far... we are blessed beyond measure for your support!

- It is warming up outside so Curtis & I are on a mission to get back into shape. Winter was cold this year so  it was extremely hard to keep up with exercising. But now the trees are in bloom and the sun is shining enough for us to start walking and jogging again. Curtis specifically wants to get back into shape so that he can go on some backpacking trips on the Appalachian trail! (A dream of his) I will be so glad to see him do that!

- My sister and I went to a ladies tea party at her church and it was so encouraging to my heart. I love women's events like that ... that focus on ministering to the feminine heart and inspiring the woman to use the gifts God has given her to serve others. During the tea party the Executive Director of "Hope Alive" came to speak about their ministry. They reach out to the homeless women and children in the Maryland area, providing them a home to stay in for 2 years as they get back on their feet financially or pursue an education. The work that they do is so inspiring and I am excited to possibly drop off some donations at the house in the near future since the house is only about 10 minutes away from us...

P.U.R.S.E

(Passionately Using Resources to Serve El Shaddai)

My heart is so blessed during this season of life! God continues to pour out His love on my heart and at times I am overwhelmed by His pure goodness! He truly is working in every area of our lives. All of the pain, hurt, troubles and sorrows that we endure during this life can all be turned around for our good with the Lord's work. He is in the business of redeeming, healing, and saving our souls! And His work is beautiful... hard at times, but if we keep enduring it will turn out to be BEAUTIFUL!!!

Our favorite recipes!

For these past 15 months of marriage I have had so much fun cooking old family recipes and trying new ones. It has been an adventure learning to plan, shop for, cook and clean up after 3 meals a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks/year - that's 1,095 meals/year! Not to mention snacks and baking! Yikes! Sometimes I feel like it is a full time job just keeping food in the fridge and on the table (and it is only just the 2 of us so far!) But I must say that I LOVE it! I enjoy planning, shopping and cooking for us! Of course, there have been times that the meal just didn't turn out right and I promised never to cook that particular meal again. And I've been told that every new bride burns the chicken at least once (done that!).

But all in all, I love my job as a wife in managing the kitchen and Curtis is always so great in being willing to help out when I need it.

So I thought it may be fun and a blessing to share with you some of our favorite recipes! Enjoy!

Corn Bread (no cornmeal) *** Best ever ***
1 (15 oz) can of whole corn
1 1/2 cups flour
1/2 cup sugar
1 Tbsp Baking Powder
1 tsp salt
1/2 cup milk
2 large eggs
1/4 cup (soft) butter
1/4 honey      
 
Picture from:http://lifes-greatest-blessings.blogspot.com/2012/09/corn-bread-muffins-real-corn-no-cornmeal.html

Directions: Process corn, mix all dry ingredients, mix all wet ingredients, combine dry and wet ingredients, Pour into 8x8 pan, bake at 400* for 25-30 minutes. Can make as muffins also.

Baked Zucchini
cooking spray
2 Tbsp minced garlic
1 Tbsp Italian Seasoning
1 Tbsp butter
4 Tbsp Olive Oil
1/2 cup Parmesan Cheese, divided
1/2 cup Romano Cheese, divided
Salt & Pepper to taste
4 Zucchini, thinly sliced
3 large tomatoes, thinly sliced
1 onion, thinly sliced                                                        
1/4 cup Mozzarella Cheese                                                              (Picture from Aldi.com)

Directions: Preheat oven to 350*, Spray 9x13 pan, mix in bowl - garlic, Italian seasoning, butter, olive oil, 1/4 cup Parmesan cheese and 1/4 cup Romano cheese, salt an pepper. Add zucchini, tomato and onion to bowl and mix. Add mixture to pan. Sprinkle with remaining Parmesan, Romano, and Mozzarella cheese. Bake for 30 minutes covered with foil. Remove foil and bake for additional 5-10 minutes.
* I just use mozzarella cheese in place of Romano Cheese.

Chicken Parmigiana
1 egg, beaten
2 ounces of bread crumbs
2 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
3/4 (16 oz.) jar spaghetti sauce
2 ounces shredded mozzarella cheese
1/4 cup Parmesan cheese

Directions: Preheat oven to 350*, lightly grease pan, (I thinly cut the chicken breast in half hot dog style and then pound it down) pour egg  and bread crumbs in separate shallow bowls. Dip chicken in egg, then into the bread crumbs and then place in pan. Cook until no longer pink, up to 40 minutes. Pour spaghetti sauce under and over chicken. Sprinkle with mozzarella and Parmesan cheese and return to oven for 20 minutes.
** Should be so tender that you can cut it with your fork!                        (Picture from all recipes.com)

And lastly for dessert! My Grandma Luta's famous ...

7-layer Cookie
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter or Margarine
1 cup graham cracker crumbs (about 12 crackers)
1 can (3 1/2 ounces or 1 1/2 cups) Flaked coconut
1 6-ounce package of chocolate pieces
1 6-ounce package of butterscotch pieces
1 can (15 ounces) Sweetened condensed milk (non-evaporated)
1 cup chopped walnuts

Directions: Preheat oven to 325*. Meanwhile, put butter in 9x13 pan and slide in oven to melt. (Don't burn). When melted, remove man from oven, tip to spread butter and sprinkle evenly with graham cracker crumbs. Top with the coconut, then chocolate, then butterscotch. Drizzle condensed mild over and sprinkle with nuts. Press nuts lightly into mixture, so they won't fall off later. Bake for 30 minutes. Cool. Cut into pieces.

Enjoy!!!